HOW did your relationship fare during the Covid lockdowns? No matter how good your relationship was, 2020 was certainly the year that highlighted all cracks and canyons.
Essentially, 2020 became the year of continuous fire-fighting. We tackled the biggest problems as they surfaced to the top of the pile. We managed as best we could. Often using band-aid solutions hoping that they would hold until we had time to resolve the underlying issues.
Now in 2021, we are getting some much-needed breathing space to finally face our relationship issues. But how do you work on your relationship when you are both burnt out from a year of fire-fighting?
Actually, it’s easy if you use one solution to resolve both issues. Good self-care is essential if you want to restore yourself and resolve your relationship at the same time. After all, you are 50% of your relationship so when you take care of yourself, you are also helping your relationship.
Imagine going to the most amazing relaxing spa retreat, with soft gentle music, in the most beautiful calm place ever. Imagine going to a place where you can completely relax, forget about the world and just be kind and loving to yourself. How good would that feel? Now imagine going to that place every day.
How much easier would it be to resolve your relationship issues when you feel fully restored, pampered and calm?
Meditation can be the ultimate inner retreat. When you practice regularly, it feels calm, gentle and kind every time you use it. In my book, meditation is the ultimate self-care gift. Where else can you restore your health, relax your body and mind and fill up on oodles of patience, calm, kindness, gratitude and love?
Ease happens when we let go of the need of the 'should haves', 'musts' and 'need tos'. Life becomes easier and that ease flows within us and into our relationships."
During 2020, my 26-year relationship also had some hiccups but using meditation daily gave me four tools to help restore our relationship quickly and easily. They are called WAKE:
Wholeness is when you feel restored to your true self again. The self that has the energy to be loving and turn conflict into harmony.
Authenticity is lovingly and patiently speaking your truth, standing strong and holding onto love no matter how difficult the conversation.
Kindness grows when you are kind to yourself. It fosters greater understanding, growth and forgiveness.
Ease happens when we let go of the need of the “should haves”, “musts” and “need tos”. Life becomes easier and that ease flows within us and into our relationships.
Meditation teaches you that the key ingredients required to resolve and restore relationships are not in books or on the Internet. They are found within a loving and open heart like the one that is sitting within your chest. Your love is the key ingredient to returning your relationship around.
So why not use one of the ultimate self-care gifts and let meditation WAKE you up and restore you and your relationship. With a more whole and authentic you, it might be even better than before. – The Vibes, May 10, 2021
Siobhan Coulter is a Love Relationship Specialist (BA (Psych) Q’ld, BPsych (Hons) Griff) and Certified Meditation Instructor.
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