Sports & Fitness

‘Forced to perform oral sex on my coach when I was 10’

Former national swimmer shares his devastating story, revealing that sexual misconduct in sports does not discriminate based on gender

Updated 2 years ago · Published on 21 Jan 2022 9:00AM

‘Forced to perform oral sex on my coach when I was 10’
A former Malaysian swimmer, who decided to come forward after twenty years with an alleged claim of being sexually assaulted as a junior athlete from the ages of ten to 17, did so because he was concerned about the welfare of other athletes as the accused is an official with the national team. – Pixabay pic, January 21, 2022

by Julie Jalaluddin

KUALA LUMPUR – Contrary to popular belief, women are not the only victims of sexual misconduct as male athletes are also victims of this scourge, which continues to run rampant in the Malaysian sports fraternity.

In a stunning turn of events last year, which has seen a growing number of Malaysian athletes come forward to reveal their experiences at the hands of sexual predators, it is understood that now a former national swimmer has revealed to being sexually assaulted as a junior athlete from the ages of ten to 17.

In an interview with The Vibes, the athlete wishes to remain anonymous due to an ongoing investigation into the matter.

Although the incidents happened about two decades ago, he decided to lodge a police report late last year and said it was traumatic to relive those harrowing moments once again when he had to relate every detail to the authorities.

Among the experiences he had to relive was the frequent forced oral sex on a senior official and be on the receiving end as well.

“What he did was he would come to us and do the things (sexual acts) to us first.

“He would then drag us into a toilet, lock us in, and proceed to touch and fondle our private parts.

“The next time around, he would then force us to do the same act on him, after which, he would shove his private parts into our mouths after forcing us down on our knees. This happened over several years.”

The former athlete decided to come forward with his story because he was concerned about the welfare of other athletes as the accused is an official with the national team.

“If I didn’t do something about it, he might still be abusing other kids – all the while thinking that he can get away with it.

“If this person is still coaching and if he is still grooming kids, I don’t see why he wouldn’t still be abusing them.”

Girls were also said to be victims

The former athlete said the sexual acts were not performed exclusively on the boys in the team, but also the girls.

“It was a fight or flight mode for us but at the time, I couldn’t think of anything else. If you were ten years old and somebody you feared did that to you, you wouldn’t know where to go or what to do.

“This person was like a brother to all of us in the team − I kept thinking how could I report this to my parents. Mind you, this was in the 1980s, when speaking up about something like this was considered taboo. In fact, it still is, after all this time.”

The former swimmer said the sexual assault happened every week, and it even took place outside of the training centre.

He added that when they were travelling for tournaments, the alleged offender would break into their rooms and touch himself as well as offer inappropriate messages to boy and girl athletes.

“While we were in the bus en route to another tournament venue, he would purposely rub his private parts against my shoulder should it happen to jut out from the bus seat.

“I also talked to some of the other juniors on the national team, who had participated in international tournaments, and they told me the same thing happened to them.”

Escaping the trauma

Eventually, the former athlete managed to escape the ordeal when he became braver as he got older and resisted the harassment.

Once he completed his SPM exams, the ex-national swimmer was no longer motivated or keen to compete anymore.

“When it happened, a lot of us tried to get away from him while some just wanted to brush it off. But many of us didn’t have faith in the authorities that action would be taken to right this terrible wrong,” shared the former athlete.

However, it was difficult for him to admit that he is still − to this day − traumatised by the ordeal.

Although more than 20 years has passed, the former athlete still experiences bouts of depression. Sometimes, he would go into a downward spiral and feel an immense anger build up inside of him.

“Growing up, I was very quiet and it’s not something that you would normally share as a child,” he said.

“If I came forward with my story back then, all I could think of was no one was going to believe me because that was what my alleged perpetrator had groomed me to believe.”

“I’m not completely over it − I don’t think I ever will be. But seeing a therapist, praying, talking to my wife and keeping myself busy are some of the things that help me manage my trauma.” – The Vibes, January 21, 2022

Related News

Malaysia / 4d

MoE vows full cooperation with authorities after teacher accused of sexual misconduct

Malaysia / 2mth

Winking, hand signs or wolf-whistling among lawyers may land you in hot soup

Malaysia / 4mth

Report of sexual harassment by law enforcer goes viral

Malaysia / 5mth

Man, believed to be foreigner, nabbed after sexually harassing student

Malaysia / 6mth

Don’t normalise sexual harassment, Nancy urges society

Malaysia / 6mth

Cops call in 13 to assist in probe into preacher’s sexual harassment case

Spotlight

Events

UK alumni lauded for stellar achievements as British Council observes 75 years in Malaysia

Malaysia

Don’t let politicians, activists stir up hatred against KK Mart, PBK tells cops

By The Vibes Team

Malaysia

7.7 mil people registered in Padu, 2.5 mil cyberattacks, but not one success: Rafizi

By Stephen Then

Malaysia

Farewell Aunty Bersih, you will be missed

By Ian McIntyre

Malaysia

Couple make two trips to workshop to find trapped kitten in car

Malaysia

KK Mart founder, director charged with wounding religious feelings of others over 'Allah' socks

By The Vibes Team