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William Shatner felt ‘overwhelming sadness’ on Blue Origin space trip

Star Trek actor shared episode in his book, Boldly Go: Reflections on a Life of Awe and Wonder

Updated 4 years ago · Published on 13 Oct 2022 1:00PM

William Shatner felt ‘overwhelming sadness’ on Blue Origin space trip
Actor William Shatner says in his book that “the beauty isn’t out there, it’s down here, with all of us". – AFP file pic, October 13, 2022

A YEAR after his launch into space on Jeff Bezos' Blue Origin rocket, actor William Shatner has related his experiences in a book.

In an excerpt from ‘Boldly Go: Reflections on a Life of Awe and Wonder’, the 91-year-old said his expectations and the reality were a mismatch.

Shatner went so far as to say he felt an “overwhelming sadness” during the trip, which he equated to a funeral, reported Huffington Post.

“I love the mystery of the universe,” he wrote. “I love all the questions that have come to us over thousands of years of exploration and hypotheses… but when I looked in the opposite direction, into space, there was no mystery, no majestic awe to behold… all I saw was death.”

The New Shepard rocket launching on October 13, 2021, from the West Texas region, 40km north of Van Horn carrying 'Star Trek' actor William Shatner on Blue Origin's second crewed mission, NS-18. – AFP file pic
The New Shepard rocket launching on October 13, 2021, from the West Texas region, 40km north of Van Horn carrying 'Star Trek' actor William Shatner on Blue Origin's second crewed mission, NS-18. – AFP file pic

The Canadian star talked about what he saw at the boundary of space, known as the Kármán Line. He described space as “a cold, dark, black emptiness … deep, enveloping, all-encompassing”.

He went on: “Everything I had thought was wrong. Everything I had expected to see was wrong.

“I had thought that going into space would be the ultimate catharsis of that connection I had been looking for between all living things – that being up there would be the next beautiful step to understanding the harmony of the universe.”

At the time, the Captain Kirk star teared up upon arrival on Earth. He said his trip was “the most profound experience I can imagine”.

Blue Origin founder Jeff Bezos awards New Shepard NS-18 mission crew member ‘Star Trek’ actor, William Shatner with a pin after the crew landed on October 13, 2021, in the West Texas region, 40km north of Van Horn. – Blue origin screen grab/AFP file pic
Blue Origin founder Jeff Bezos awards New Shepard NS-18 mission crew member ‘Star Trek’ actor, William Shatner with a pin after the crew landed on October 13, 2021, in the West Texas region, 40km north of Van Horn. – Blue origin screen grab/AFP file pic

“I hope I never recover from this,” he told reporters. “I’m so filled with emotion about what just happened. It’s extraordinary, extraordinary.”

But a year later, in his book, the actor said that “the beauty isn’t out there, it’s down here, with all of us. Leaving that behind made my connection to our tiny planet even more profound.”

He added: “It was among the strongest feelings of grief I have ever encountered. The contrast between the vicious coldness of space and the warm nurturing of Earth below filled me with overwhelming sadness.

“Every day, we are confronted with the knowledge of further destruction of Earth at our hands: the extinction of animal species, of flora and fauna… things that took 5bn years to evolve, and suddenly we will never see them again because of the interference of mankind. It filled me with dread.

“My trip to space was supposed to be a celebration; instead, it felt like a funeral.” – The Vibes, October 13, 2022

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